Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
So, no matter what happens today, hold on to this. At least you're not naked under your ex husband's trench coat being stopped by the police who also work with your ex husband. Long story. Actually, not a long story. That's it.
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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