goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
