You're my little dorito
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
