Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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