So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
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