and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
