This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
you started looking at my couch laughing and saying to it "she thinks I'm talking to you" then proceeded to laugh and talk to the couch some more.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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