Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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