At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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