Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
