ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
He refused my I'm sry gift of ANAL. That's how angry he was.
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
I'm going to start using the hurricane naming system for my hangovers. Hangover Agatha is a real bitch today.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
