i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize
