it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
tonight lets celebrate not being married
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Randomize
