Haym$ered
turn off your phone and go to bed
Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
be right there i have to get my cape
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
Randomize
