Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Randomize
