I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Leaving Denver airport I just saw a group of young Republicans in matching green T-shirts that said "4/20 Baby!"
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Visiting my great uncle went well. The highlight of the evening was when he said, "Oh my god. I'm 79 and I'm teaching 18 year old kids how to roll a joint."
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