what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
my mouth smells like i just ate out a crab.
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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