i was born a porn star she said
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
just drove past - why are you walking towards the shop in your pyjamas?
Can't talk, on a quest for bacon.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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