I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
Randomize
