his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I use my feet as sexual weapons
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
