batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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