Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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