dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Randomize
