My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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