Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
Randomize
