she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
I think people are normalizing furries
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
