I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
drinking out of a sandbucket again
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
One last thing: he lists glow sticks and tacos as things he can't live without. How would we not be friends??
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
