Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
"Every minute you spend hanging out with David is a minute you could spend meeting someone new, who isn't a huge douche" - Buddha
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
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