Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
tell your sister to shave her snatch
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
