i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
He left weed in my bong for me this morning. What a guy.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
