Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
