if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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