I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Who knew I could feel anymore shameful at the bar than i usually do...I think my bartender recognizes me from the walk of shame out of his house after i hooked up with his son yesterday
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
