Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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