just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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