I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
