Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
let's just pour the lemonade mix into the soco. cut out the middle man.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
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