So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Im part way to drunk.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
