Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
