She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
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