I woke up at 7am naked in my bathtub with the shower running. My apartment was so full of steam that my ceiling was dripping. Who thought it would be okay for me to get my own place, anyway?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
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