This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Oh good, bag of butt plugs is in my predictive text now
Typing the whole thing out was getting to be such a chore
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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