addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
i black out too much to be "responsible"
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
Randomize
