4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
dont ever go to laser tag drunk. you will be judged.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
