I want to stick my p in your. b.
Fun fact: when I ripped off my wristband, I punched myself in the face. Rad
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
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