HIV tests are more positive than that guy
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
