So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
The uberlube is also flammable
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
I DEMAND FORESKIN
Randomize
