And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
You ordered a "mcblizzard" and yelled @ the worker for false advertisement because she didn't flip your "mcblizzard" upsidedown. You wanted it free. I'd say mcdonalds daytime workers need to be trained in dealing with daytime drunks too. She didn't know what to do.
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
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