it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
Ur just texting me random shit. That's what Twitter is for
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Green mimosas i think yes
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
