East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
