So drunk its hurt
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Don't tell me you're on acid again
i believe in u and ur pee
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
